What a difference discipline makes!

I have been trying to be very consistent and clear with Ryan for the past few days and it's working! Time Out has become a very effective tool for us. It may not work with everyone, and I'm certainly not implying my daughter has miraculously stopped all of her normal 3 year old behavior, but effective discipline makes all the difference!

So what did I do?! Well, the first time Ryan didn't cooperate, I put her in time out on the couch, TV off, no toys, etc. Believe me, when she cried like I'd stabbed her, it hurt me, but I walked away and didn't engage.  Also, I try to keep my voice matching my words. I have a fabulous friend named Margie Cole who has a life coaching business. I am so lucky because not only do I work with her professionally as my coach, but she has been a great friend to me for 13 years! I get a lot of advice that turns things around immediately.

Margie told me not to hide my feelings because kids sense them anyway. Ryan knows we're upset that she's using any surface she chooses as her toilet, but I've been so careful to be kind and patient. Margie said that's baloney! Let her know you're angry, say what you mean and mean what you say. Now, she by no means is saying to be overly aggressive or punitive, but many parents are afraid to be firm and I need to let that fear go.

If you are interested in reading more about Margie, her website is thesharedjourney.com. You can also click on the My Recommendations tab. It is a direct link to Margie's work. She is interested in helping people be their best selves, as parents, teachers, spiritually, etc. Don't just take my word for it; read her blog and see for yourself :) You won't regret it!

Anyway, back to Ryan and her progress. Mine too :) She hasn't peed or pooed on the floor, deck, or in her pants since Wednesday! Yay! What a relief. The next time she pooped in an inappropriate place, which was in her pants on Wednesday, I scooped her up and said, "We poop in the potty. We are going to use the potty now and get cleaned up. After that, you are in time out for 3 minutes." Boy, did she scream! But I persevered and just kept repeating those simple words. She completely cooperated, hoping I'd let her out of time out, (fat chance! can't back down now!) and she went to her room sobbing pitifully. It lasted 30 seconds, she settled down, stayed in her room and came out a changed girl!

Heaven :) Steve and I are so grateful that my sister Lora and my friend Margie have been there done that and gave us guidance. Try it! You'll like the results :)